Melancholy

It seems that after 20 years of Husband travelling I would be more than accustomed to being alone for extended times. But, that is certainly not the case. I miss him more and more each time he leaves.

This trip is an extraordinarily long trip. He will visit India and Thailand as he visits clients and customers. I am perfectly able to handle home and family while he is gone (after all, I've done it for years, at times with four teens at home). But, even though I have school and work, at the end of the day I want to share it with him.

I can, and do, experience some really interesting and entertaining events without him. They just don't have as much impact without someone to share them with. For example, I attended a lecture last week by Daryl Davis (look him up, you will be astounded), but I was alone. I wanted to relate my experience with someone who would care how it affected me.

I am reminded of a scene in a movie and I think it communicates why I miss Husband so much. It is from the movie "Shall We Dance", spoken by Susan Sarandon's character, Beverly Clark,

"We need a witness to our lives. There's a billion people on the planet... I mean, what does any one life really mean? But in a marriage, you're promising to care about everything. The good things, the bad things, the terrible things, the mundane things... all of it, all of the time, every day. You're saying 'Your life will not go unnoticed because I will notice it. Your life will not go un-witnessed because I will be your witness'."

Yep, that's it, that is why I miss him so much. I want him to witness my life and I want to witness his.

Love you Husband. Be safe.