Some Days Stink

Some days just stink and this has been one of those days. It's difficult to even put into words how frustrated I am with everthing and everyone. So, you may be thinking to yourself, "Are you sure it isn't you?" I don't think it is, but, I am willing to concede that all my gripes are not about today. I have conveniently dredged up every time I feel I was slighted in the past 24 years. Let me tell you, that makes a pretty long list. The first rule of thumb about fighting fair with anyone is DONT BRING UP THE PAST. I want to fight fair, but I am having a hard time keeping myself in the present. The confrontation is due to begin soon. Will I do the right thing and hold my tongue so I can be a good listener? Surely, please tell me, surely there is an explanation that will soothe my broken spirit. I want reconciliation with all, what must I do to be saved from this mire?

Listen, forgive, and love.

I Don't Get It!!

I love that 16 has a driver's license. I enjoy seeing 16 experience a degree of freedom which signifies coming of age and maturing into an adult. That is my job. Growing my children and moving them to independence. We have a few simple rules that accompany a new driver's license. The most important is that permission is required for a few months before you can drive anywhere. In very few instances permission would be witheld. In the beginning it is a requirement, but what develops is the courtesy to let the parents know where you are. Well, two days after 16 had the license 16 broke the rule. The car was put in the garage for 3 days. Now, here we are again, just 2 days later, and the rule has been broken yet again. 16 didn't even go somewhere that was wrong. 16 would not have been denied to take the car, yet 16 did not follow the simple rule. I don't get it!!! Why? Is this a test? Will parents really do what we say? I assure you we will. The consequences were extremely clear. "If you don't follow the rule, the car will be parked." Will someone please help me understand why this is such an issue with 16, PLEASE!!!?

By the way, with 22 and 21, this issue never occured.

Home Again

Home again!! Barcelona was fabulous. The Mediteranean Sea is everything I expected. Spending the week with husband, without children, was spectacular. How could it be anything but good when you are alone with your husband in Catalonia. We needed the time together since he has been travelling a great deal lately. It was difficult to come home without him, but I survived. The hardest issue to deal with was getting 16's drivers license. She was a little ugly since she had to wait 3 weeks past her birthday. I was feeling a little sorry for myself and wanted some symapathy from 21 and did not get it. Then I really was a mess. Why would I believe that I could get understanding from anyone who has not had children when my sense of loss was caused from such a relationship? And, for me, it was a significant loss. First, because I wanted 16 to understand and agree, that the delay in her receiving her license really had nothing to do with me, but had everything to do with her. Second, because I thought that 21 and I had reached a different level in our relationship where the world really didn't revolve around her, but around me, too. Well, you guessed it, 16 will never agree and the world really is revolving around 21 right now.

I would really like to share about the questions I posed for myself before I left for my trip, but I fear it may take longer than I have at the moment. I will try to tackle one before I sign off.

What makes a good friend? A good friend is someone who genuinely wants what is best for you at all times. They may not necessarily always be in touch, however, when contact is made, authentic love abounds. This is evident by probing questions, thoughtful answers (which sometimes may be a painful), and actions that always reveal the character of Christ.