I am spending the weekend with some new friends. Usually I anticipate new experiences with great expectation and joy. I love new and different. But, for some reason, today I am hesitant. Tenative, not because the new experience is dreaded, but, because in my heart somewhere I think I may need a rest from all the change that has taken place over the last year. Lots of new events are occurring in my life, all good. New friends, new church, well, new "everything" as far as relationships go (other than my immediate family). New goals, new expectations. I think what may make me hesitate to want these changes is not that they aren't better for me, it's just that I really liked my old "everything".
I still have those old relationships and friends, they are different, though, because we don't have our regular routine anymore. We are trying to figure out how to have them in a different context. We don't study much together any longer or discuss what we are learning as often anymore. These times are becoming fewer and farther between and that is truly sad.
I want to want to move on. I desire to have what is the absolute best for me. I need reviving. That is what I will anticipate for this weekend, renewal, regeneration, rejuvenation, replenishing. That is what I am asking for, Lord, new revelation of You.
Friday, March 30, 2007
Thursday, March 22, 2007
Dead as a Doornail
Where did that expression come from? Maybe because you are supposed to hit the doornail again and again on the head and it's no worse off than when you began the beating? Oh well, I digress. What is dead is not our doornail (what is a doornail, anyway?), it is Husband's car. Yep! That's right, 18 killed the car. "Now what?" you may ask. Are we angry with 18? Will we make her pay? Will we hold it over her head until we feel better? No, none of the above.
She asked the same question when she discovered the car was deceased.
"Are you mad at me?"
"No", I answered slowly, trying to figure out exactly how I felt at the moment.
"What are you going to do?" 18 asked me, because, of course, Husband is out of town.
"Well, honey, I guess we are all just going to..." searching for words...
"We are all just going to pay for the consequences of my mistake!!!" 18 interjected.
No truer words have been spoken by such a young soul. The reality of poor choices is that they are not made in a vacuum. Our decisions, good or bad, effect everyone around us. The decision to take Husband's car last week will be an expensive one. We must replace it, it is a necessity. Every month will be financially leaner for Husband and I because we will have a car payment we did not expect. We will still have college bills, groceries to buy, mortgage etc. In essence less money for the fun stuff.
You may think this was an awful event in the life of our family. I am not so sure I agree. If my 18 year old can see the truth about sin and the dire consequences of it, and use that knowledge in the future to avoid a worse mistake, then I welcome the cost. After all, my sin has been paid for, and not by me!
She asked the same question when she discovered the car was deceased.
"Are you mad at me?"
"No", I answered slowly, trying to figure out exactly how I felt at the moment.
"What are you going to do?" 18 asked me, because, of course, Husband is out of town.
"Well, honey, I guess we are all just going to..." searching for words...
"We are all just going to pay for the consequences of my mistake!!!" 18 interjected.
No truer words have been spoken by such a young soul. The reality of poor choices is that they are not made in a vacuum. Our decisions, good or bad, effect everyone around us. The decision to take Husband's car last week will be an expensive one. We must replace it, it is a necessity. Every month will be financially leaner for Husband and I because we will have a car payment we did not expect. We will still have college bills, groceries to buy, mortgage etc. In essence less money for the fun stuff.
You may think this was an awful event in the life of our family. I am not so sure I agree. If my 18 year old can see the truth about sin and the dire consequences of it, and use that knowledge in the future to avoid a worse mistake, then I welcome the cost. After all, my sin has been paid for, and not by me!
Tuesday, March 20, 2007
The Return
I am so tired I can hardly think about what I want to share tonight because we have just returned, but, I feel I must record a few of these emotions I have welled up inside. The first is how very thankful I am to have been to such a fabulous place as Paris, France. The Eiffel Tower was spectacular! Not to mention the Arch de Triomphe, Louvre, Orsay, Invalides, Sacre Cour, Versailles, etc. Each one held it's own beauty and charisma. Nevertheless, what I am clinging to in my heart and pondering with great affection are the precious moments Husband and I spent with 18 and 15 (almost 16). Eating crepes with Nutella (chocolate paste) for breakfast, afternoon snack and late night snack. All four of us talking on our bed till late about the days events. 18 drilling 15 about what she learned that day. Trying to order our meals in French and absolutely butchering that beautiful language. Eating french fries every day! Hearing them say "WOW" when they first glimpsed the grandness of the Arch de Triomphe. Riding miles and miles and miles on the Metro and trying to find a place for all four of us to sit together in rush hour just to find a dress for 18 to wear to her prom. Watching them stare at a sculpture in the Louvre with awe and wonder.
Paris was brilliant, but the snapshots that are emblazoned on my heart and soul and that I hold dear are of my girls and the relationships we sealed this week. xxooxx I love you.
Paris was brilliant, but the snapshots that are emblazoned on my heart and soul and that I hold dear are of my girls and the relationships we sealed this week. xxooxx I love you.
Tuesday, March 13, 2007
Incredible
That's what I call my life somedays, simply incredible. Today, 15, 17, and I will be leaving for Paris. France, that is. We will be meeting Husband there to holiday together. (He has been in Singapore on a business trip.) We are vacationing in Gay Paree!! Oh, my goodness! How does someone like me get to do something as fabulous as spending spring break around the world? Oh, well, I am not going to look for answers today, I am simply going to prepare to have a grand time with 15 and 17.
This could be a challenge. 15 and 17 don't always have fun together. They are as different as night and day. One is quiet the other is talkative. One is an optimist, the other a pessimist. One an overpacker, one an underpacker. Dark, light. Alarmist, calm. Impatient, patient. Brash, gentle. Could they possibly be more different. I don't think so. But, this is what gives life it's color. Who wants a gray world? I don't. I admit, I could do without some of the more difficult challenges my children cause me to face, but, in reality would the good times be as precious without having experienced the thornier days?
I have delayed this extravagant vacation with children because I have feared I might not have a good time with them.They probably will not appreciate me and all the effort I have to put forth in order for this trip to take place. The money, the time to plan each day, the jet lag, the relationships, the everything. But, today, I believe it will all be worth it. They are excited to go and looking forward to every moment. I will genuinely take pleasure in merely watching them experience Paris, from packing to returning home. I will hold every moment captive because we will probably never get to experience this with them again.
Thank you Lord for your gracious generosity. Thank you for my children. Thank you for Husband.
This could be a challenge. 15 and 17 don't always have fun together. They are as different as night and day. One is quiet the other is talkative. One is an optimist, the other a pessimist. One an overpacker, one an underpacker. Dark, light. Alarmist, calm. Impatient, patient. Brash, gentle. Could they possibly be more different. I don't think so. But, this is what gives life it's color. Who wants a gray world? I don't. I admit, I could do without some of the more difficult challenges my children cause me to face, but, in reality would the good times be as precious without having experienced the thornier days?
I have delayed this extravagant vacation with children because I have feared I might not have a good time with them.They probably will not appreciate me and all the effort I have to put forth in order for this trip to take place. The money, the time to plan each day, the jet lag, the relationships, the everything. But, today, I believe it will all be worth it. They are excited to go and looking forward to every moment. I will genuinely take pleasure in merely watching them experience Paris, from packing to returning home. I will hold every moment captive because we will probably never get to experience this with them again.
Thank you Lord for your gracious generosity. Thank you for my children. Thank you for Husband.
Stranded
The phone was ringing. I answered. "MOM, Why didn't you tell me I couldn't drive Dad's car!!!?!" "Who is this and why are you yelling at me?" is all I could think. After a few moments of loud interrogation I finally determined who she was (17), where she was, and proceeded to rescue her and her two friends. The three of them had decided to go shopping in a town that was thirty miles away, in traffic, without a map and had wandered lost for a while. Husband's car had been having a little trouble with overheating lately and we had parked it until he could return from a business trip and take it to the mechanic. The car was in bad shape. Now what do I do? Why do I always have to deal with these things myself when husband is out of town? I hate this part of mothering and wifing!!
17, who incidentally will turn 18 in five days, was stranded, and it was all my fault. NOT!! 17 has a habit of blaming others for her poor decisions or problems. Nothing, I repeat, nothing is ever her fault. If she is unhappy, frustrated, experiencing anything unpleasant, it must be someone else's fault! Now, we all know that at some point each of us must take responsiblity for ourselves. You know, not be a victim, simply decide to do something that will address the reasons for our negative feelings and circumstances. My only question is how can I get 17 to do that, too? I have made every effort to reveal this unconstructive trait to her. Realistically, this process started five years ago in junior high when she began to have a little freedom going places with the youth group.
She called back to see how close I was.
"I am at least 20 minutes away" I answered. "17," I said.
"Yes, Mom?"
" I need to say something to you, and I don't think you are going to like it."
"What?"
"You know what we talked about the other day? That difficulty you have?"
"You mean the one where I blame you for all my problems?"
"Yes, that one," I said with a little hope, "Do you think you did that here?"
"Did I do that?" 17 asked with hesitation.
"Well, did I know that you were going to drive dad's car?" I asked hoping she would see where this was going.
"No, I just jumped in it and left."
"Did I know how far away you were going to shop?"
"No," She answered, "And mom?"
"Yes?"
"I knew it was having a problem overheating, I'm sorry, this is all my fault. We're stuck and the car is in terrible shape and it is my fault. " She freely admitted.
Woo Hoo (is that how you spell that?) I still had to point it out, but, the process this time was a little less painful and quicker than usual. I actually have hope that next time I may not even be accused of sabotaging her plans (well I wouldn't really go that far, but I am an optimist).
Isn't this what God wants of us? Admit we are the problem, He will rescue us. Please Lord, let me be quicker to admit my faults and responsibility in causing most of my own predicaments. In short, Lord, save me from myself.
17, who incidentally will turn 18 in five days, was stranded, and it was all my fault. NOT!! 17 has a habit of blaming others for her poor decisions or problems. Nothing, I repeat, nothing is ever her fault. If she is unhappy, frustrated, experiencing anything unpleasant, it must be someone else's fault! Now, we all know that at some point each of us must take responsiblity for ourselves. You know, not be a victim, simply decide to do something that will address the reasons for our negative feelings and circumstances. My only question is how can I get 17 to do that, too? I have made every effort to reveal this unconstructive trait to her. Realistically, this process started five years ago in junior high when she began to have a little freedom going places with the youth group.
She called back to see how close I was.
"I am at least 20 minutes away" I answered. "17," I said.
"Yes, Mom?"
" I need to say something to you, and I don't think you are going to like it."
"What?"
"You know what we talked about the other day? That difficulty you have?"
"You mean the one where I blame you for all my problems?"
"Yes, that one," I said with a little hope, "Do you think you did that here?"
"Did I do that?" 17 asked with hesitation.
"Well, did I know that you were going to drive dad's car?" I asked hoping she would see where this was going.
"No, I just jumped in it and left."
"Did I know how far away you were going to shop?"
"No," She answered, "And mom?"
"Yes?"
"I knew it was having a problem overheating, I'm sorry, this is all my fault. We're stuck and the car is in terrible shape and it is my fault. " She freely admitted.
Woo Hoo (is that how you spell that?) I still had to point it out, but, the process this time was a little less painful and quicker than usual. I actually have hope that next time I may not even be accused of sabotaging her plans (well I wouldn't really go that far, but I am an optimist).
Isn't this what God wants of us? Admit we are the problem, He will rescue us. Please Lord, let me be quicker to admit my faults and responsibility in causing most of my own predicaments. In short, Lord, save me from myself.
Tuesday, March 06, 2007
What Delights You?
"What delights you?" Merriam Webster defines delight as "a high degree of gratification : joy; also : extreme satisfaction".
That question was posed to me recently and I must confess my answer didn't come as quickly as I had wished. I even began to wonder if I delighted in anything! My thoughts became bogged down in the definition and implication that delight invokes involuntary joy. So, in what things do I involuntarily find "extreme satisfaction". What ensued was a day of examining things I have and people with whom I interact. As I scrutinized these things and relationships I realized that it takes a great deal of work just to keep them functioning. And, if everything in my life takes so much effort to make it bearable, is there really any joy in that? Is there any delight in that? Here is the list I came up with and the grade I gave it according to the "extreme satisfaction" it gives me. (1= no satisfaction, 5= extreme satisfaction)
House 1 (But, when I work to improve it, clean it, or plant new flowers and it becomes beautiful that "satisfies" me,) new score 3
Car 1 (It is a really nice car, but, it gets dirty, dinged, and costs a lot of money to keep it running. The only satifaction is if I maintain it well and get to the places I want to go when I want to get there) new score 3
Friends 3 (I have many acquaintances and friends and we enjoy a lot of laughter. Some of us get together quite often to celebrate in many ways. But, having close friends is a lot of work. It takes great deal of effort to plan times for us to get together and there are times when we must work through hurt feelings, disappointments, expectations.) new score (for the friends that have been the most work) 5
Marriage 3 (This relationship of almost 26 years is one of the most difficult to preserve. When I have ignored it I have detested it, when I have worked the hardest it has genuinely delighted me) new score 5
Children 2 (This may seem like an extremely low score to you, but, you should have been here in the really disappointing times. I toiled emotionally, physically, and mentally and still found that I came up short in rearing them. However, when I really got serious about spiritually educating myself about parenting, God worked miracles and let me take part.) new score 5
God 5 (This score starts out high because I realize His mercy is the only thing I have in this relationship. When I make any effort to seek Him, please Him, obey Him, the satisfaction scale goes out of this world, literally!) new score 99999999999999999999999999
Well, my first impression of the meaning of delight was to simply look around and see if anything made me smile. But, what I think I have discovered is that delight is found in experiencing the consequences of working hard and doing the right things, especially in my relationships. This was quite a lesson for me. Rarely is anything the way it may first appear. The things that you think will please you, like nice houses and cars, nice clothes and stuff in general, may give you a sense of well being for a short time, but they scored low on my pleasure scale. The things that I feel that cause me the most pain and work, like friends, marriage, kids are what really give me the fulfillment I desire. This was an eye-opener for me. It encourages me to do what I know is right and continue to work for healthy, more intimate relationships.
That question was posed to me recently and I must confess my answer didn't come as quickly as I had wished. I even began to wonder if I delighted in anything! My thoughts became bogged down in the definition and implication that delight invokes involuntary joy. So, in what things do I involuntarily find "extreme satisfaction". What ensued was a day of examining things I have and people with whom I interact. As I scrutinized these things and relationships I realized that it takes a great deal of work just to keep them functioning. And, if everything in my life takes so much effort to make it bearable, is there really any joy in that? Is there any delight in that? Here is the list I came up with and the grade I gave it according to the "extreme satisfaction" it gives me. (1= no satisfaction, 5= extreme satisfaction)
House 1 (But, when I work to improve it, clean it, or plant new flowers and it becomes beautiful that "satisfies" me,) new score 3
Car 1 (It is a really nice car, but, it gets dirty, dinged, and costs a lot of money to keep it running. The only satifaction is if I maintain it well and get to the places I want to go when I want to get there) new score 3
Friends 3 (I have many acquaintances and friends and we enjoy a lot of laughter. Some of us get together quite often to celebrate in many ways. But, having close friends is a lot of work. It takes great deal of effort to plan times for us to get together and there are times when we must work through hurt feelings, disappointments, expectations.) new score (for the friends that have been the most work) 5
Marriage 3 (This relationship of almost 26 years is one of the most difficult to preserve. When I have ignored it I have detested it, when I have worked the hardest it has genuinely delighted me) new score 5
Children 2 (This may seem like an extremely low score to you, but, you should have been here in the really disappointing times. I toiled emotionally, physically, and mentally and still found that I came up short in rearing them. However, when I really got serious about spiritually educating myself about parenting, God worked miracles and let me take part.) new score 5
God 5 (This score starts out high because I realize His mercy is the only thing I have in this relationship. When I make any effort to seek Him, please Him, obey Him, the satisfaction scale goes out of this world, literally!) new score 99999999999999999999999999
Well, my first impression of the meaning of delight was to simply look around and see if anything made me smile. But, what I think I have discovered is that delight is found in experiencing the consequences of working hard and doing the right things, especially in my relationships. This was quite a lesson for me. Rarely is anything the way it may first appear. The things that you think will please you, like nice houses and cars, nice clothes and stuff in general, may give you a sense of well being for a short time, but they scored low on my pleasure scale. The things that I feel that cause me the most pain and work, like friends, marriage, kids are what really give me the fulfillment I desire. This was an eye-opener for me. It encourages me to do what I know is right and continue to work for healthy, more intimate relationships.
Wednesday, February 21, 2007
I'm Only Human
Yes, once again I have been reminded of my human frailties. Once more I have seen the stark reality that my very existence is held in the hands of a Sovereign God. I can make a valiant effort and try to deceive myself and ignore this fact on most days, but, every now and then God takes pity on me and reminds me that He is undeniably in command of every moment of my survival. I could not will the illness away, as much as I tried, it continued until my infirmed body could take no more and needed what I could not do alone, iv fluids from the er.
When faced with insurmountable and overwhelming events in life most people ask the question "Why me?" or "How can God allow this bad stuff to happen to me?". But, I discover that the more profound question I find in my soul that I need answered is, "Why have You excused me from being sick every day?", or "Why have You chosen to give me anything good when I give You so little?"
I was very ill this weekend and was unable to care for myself, even my most fundamental needs. Husband stepped into the role as nurse and was amazing. He washed me, carried me, nursed me, steadied me. Even in my wretched filthiness he loved and me cared for me. I am astonished at his actions of affections for me.
What a picture!! It is the very depiction of how Jesus takes us in our filthy state of sinfulness while we cannot clean ourselves and washes us clean with His own Goodness and Love. He then carries me, nurses me, steadies me and then walks with me for eternity. I have no words to express my graditude for this undeserved healing, therefore, I must communicate my indebtedness by my actions. Also, I want to tell everyone who is still sick who can heal them! Jesus can!! Jesus will!! Every breath we have is another moment to realize the truth about a Redeemer who heals for eternity. Thank you, Jesus, for Your Loving Care.
When faced with insurmountable and overwhelming events in life most people ask the question "Why me?" or "How can God allow this bad stuff to happen to me?". But, I discover that the more profound question I find in my soul that I need answered is, "Why have You excused me from being sick every day?", or "Why have You chosen to give me anything good when I give You so little?"
I was very ill this weekend and was unable to care for myself, even my most fundamental needs. Husband stepped into the role as nurse and was amazing. He washed me, carried me, nursed me, steadied me. Even in my wretched filthiness he loved and me cared for me. I am astonished at his actions of affections for me.
What a picture!! It is the very depiction of how Jesus takes us in our filthy state of sinfulness while we cannot clean ourselves and washes us clean with His own Goodness and Love. He then carries me, nurses me, steadies me and then walks with me for eternity. I have no words to express my graditude for this undeserved healing, therefore, I must communicate my indebtedness by my actions. Also, I want to tell everyone who is still sick who can heal them! Jesus can!! Jesus will!! Every breath we have is another moment to realize the truth about a Redeemer who heals for eternity. Thank you, Jesus, for Your Loving Care.
Saturday, February 17, 2007
Awake To Righteousness
I didn't even know that I was dozing! I read that verse and I knew exactly what I should do. Wake up to what is excellent!! Pay attention to what I am doing and how it affects others!! Quit being apathetic to what is best for me and all those around me. That would include husband, children, friends, and even those who simply see me responding to this world.
In every situation there is a wrong, not so wrong, and best response. I think that most times I apathetically choose what is "not so wrong". That surely couldn't hurt anything, could it? Well, I guess I might have to argue with myself at this point. Yes, apathy hurts, and ultimately numbs us to making any good (and by good I mean absence of evil, pure) decisions. I desire, yes and even expect, my children to make the very best choices each day in every situation they face. Why do I settle for less in myself? It only leads to experiencing a mediocre life, and that is not good enough! I simply must "Awake to Righteousness" and then I can expect an extraordinary existence.
Lord, open my eyes to what is righteous. Wake me, rouse me, stir me to Your excellent way.
In every situation there is a wrong, not so wrong, and best response. I think that most times I apathetically choose what is "not so wrong". That surely couldn't hurt anything, could it? Well, I guess I might have to argue with myself at this point. Yes, apathy hurts, and ultimately numbs us to making any good (and by good I mean absence of evil, pure) decisions. I desire, yes and even expect, my children to make the very best choices each day in every situation they face. Why do I settle for less in myself? It only leads to experiencing a mediocre life, and that is not good enough! I simply must "Awake to Righteousness" and then I can expect an extraordinary existence.
Lord, open my eyes to what is righteous. Wake me, rouse me, stir me to Your excellent way.
Friday, February 16, 2007
Miracles Still Happen
Have you ever seen a real live miracle? I mean right before your very eyes. Did you try to explain it away? How did you respond?
Well, I will tell you that today, I saw a miracle. One of my good friends has a really dangerous bacterial infection and is fighting it with "Big Gun" drugs. Today she did not feel well when I saw her this morning. In fact, it appeared the enemy (illness) was going to have it's way with her today. Not in my house! Or, I should say, not in my Father's house! Six of us gathered around her and touched her with our hands so that she could feel our hearts and souls as we pleaded with our Heavenly Father to protect her physical body today. Do you know that He immediately answered our prayer. The seven of us went on to eat, talk, play, and share our day together and, as usual, she was in the middle of the mix, and she was great company.
I admit several of us tried to excuse the result of our prayers. We said "maybe the cold, dry weather this morning simply caused her to have a raspy, dry throat and cough. Maybe she really didn't feel as bad as she (or we) thought." No, that is not the case. Must I remind myself that we should not doubt the power of a prayer. She did have a terrible cough (I heard it myself). She did gasp for breath as she walked from room to room (she is usually a physically fit woman). She does have an infection that is dangerous to all those who are attacked by it. GOD DID ANSWER OUR PRAYER FOR HER PROTECTION TODAY!!
Thank you, Father, for your answer to our need. Let me close my physical eyes in order to see you work in our spiritual lives. Thank You that You work in our physical world as evidence of Your remarkable power. I do trust You. I do love You. Amen.
Well, I will tell you that today, I saw a miracle. One of my good friends has a really dangerous bacterial infection and is fighting it with "Big Gun" drugs. Today she did not feel well when I saw her this morning. In fact, it appeared the enemy (illness) was going to have it's way with her today. Not in my house! Or, I should say, not in my Father's house! Six of us gathered around her and touched her with our hands so that she could feel our hearts and souls as we pleaded with our Heavenly Father to protect her physical body today. Do you know that He immediately answered our prayer. The seven of us went on to eat, talk, play, and share our day together and, as usual, she was in the middle of the mix, and she was great company.
I admit several of us tried to excuse the result of our prayers. We said "maybe the cold, dry weather this morning simply caused her to have a raspy, dry throat and cough. Maybe she really didn't feel as bad as she (or we) thought." No, that is not the case. Must I remind myself that we should not doubt the power of a prayer. She did have a terrible cough (I heard it myself). She did gasp for breath as she walked from room to room (she is usually a physically fit woman). She does have an infection that is dangerous to all those who are attacked by it. GOD DID ANSWER OUR PRAYER FOR HER PROTECTION TODAY!!
Thank you, Father, for your answer to our need. Let me close my physical eyes in order to see you work in our spiritual lives. Thank You that You work in our physical world as evidence of Your remarkable power. I do trust You. I do love You. Amen.
Monday, February 12, 2007
Sunday Lunches
I treasure Sunday lunches at our house. The very words "Sunday lunch" have such special meaning to me. That simple phrase means that we greeted one another after worshipping our Savior , filled our plates with our favorite food, sat around a grand table with beloved people, and talked about subjects that are dear to our hearts.
Yesterday was such a day. Several things make yesterday exceptionally wonderful. First, we were celebrating my son's birthday. He is 24 and an outstanding son, friend, husband, and father. I couldn't be prouder. Second, we were celebrating 24 moving his family back to our city. They have been "in the wilderness" for fifteen months and having them close again in proximity is a joy. Next, my 88 year old grandmother was here to watch my grandchildren play, cry, and generally steal the show. Five generations! That is a rarity and oh, so extraordinary. We hold every moment with her captive knowing our time with her is short .
Now that I think of it we really didn't talk about important subjects or conquer significant social issues. Basically, we just shared time with one another. That, oh so, fleeting commodity of time. So, I guess it really isn't the "Sunday lunches" that are extraordinary, it is really the people that come together and commit that brief, passing, never to be had again moment in time with me that causes me to relish the memories we have around that table.
Oh, LORD God, let me never forget to savor each moment You give me with others. Let me never waste time consumed with useless matters or emotions. Let me speak Truth to them and love them with Your kind of love.
Yesterday was such a day. Several things make yesterday exceptionally wonderful. First, we were celebrating my son's birthday. He is 24 and an outstanding son, friend, husband, and father. I couldn't be prouder. Second, we were celebrating 24 moving his family back to our city. They have been "in the wilderness" for fifteen months and having them close again in proximity is a joy. Next, my 88 year old grandmother was here to watch my grandchildren play, cry, and generally steal the show. Five generations! That is a rarity and oh, so extraordinary. We hold every moment with her captive knowing our time with her is short .
Now that I think of it we really didn't talk about important subjects or conquer significant social issues. Basically, we just shared time with one another. That, oh so, fleeting commodity of time. So, I guess it really isn't the "Sunday lunches" that are extraordinary, it is really the people that come together and commit that brief, passing, never to be had again moment in time with me that causes me to relish the memories we have around that table.
Oh, LORD God, let me never forget to savor each moment You give me with others. Let me never waste time consumed with useless matters or emotions. Let me speak Truth to them and love them with Your kind of love.
Monday, February 05, 2007
State Mandated HPV Vaccines
Here we go again! Unfortunately, the secular world is seeing the necessity to meet a physical need caused by a spiritual liability. Our shortcomings as salt and light to our world become painfully clear as the consequences of sin develop greater tribulations for the children (and yes, the adults, too) of our world. We are at this crossroad because we chose to be apathetic about purity (on a grand scale) in our own lives as well as the lives of our children in the past. Regrettably, if we as Christians, fight against the state mandated "solution" to this STD, we appear as uncaring and stoic. However, if we support the vaccine, we seem to acquiesce to the status quo of promiscuity. What is the solution on a Christian level?
1. Make sure we, as individuals, are living every moment what we say we believe. Our own children will then know and see Truth for themselves and have a better chance of experiencing life without the devasting consequences of sin.
2. Opt out of the vaccine, but only if you choose to educate your children on the spiritual level about the choices which have led to these physical consequences. This is a lifetime commitment, not a one time conversation.
3. Heed the call to affect others in this matter (only you know to what level of ministry God has called you).
This is absolutely not the complete answer to this crisis. However, until we as Christians decide what we believe how will we ever be able to stand up for anything? I am convinced that most of us do not really know what the Bible has to say about the practicality of living day to day. The only way it will ever be written on our hearts is when we ask God to allow us to hear Him. He is always speaking, will I listen?
1. Make sure we, as individuals, are living every moment what we say we believe. Our own children will then know and see Truth for themselves and have a better chance of experiencing life without the devasting consequences of sin.
2. Opt out of the vaccine, but only if you choose to educate your children on the spiritual level about the choices which have led to these physical consequences. This is a lifetime commitment, not a one time conversation.
3. Heed the call to affect others in this matter (only you know to what level of ministry God has called you).
This is absolutely not the complete answer to this crisis. However, until we as Christians decide what we believe how will we ever be able to stand up for anything? I am convinced that most of us do not really know what the Bible has to say about the practicality of living day to day. The only way it will ever be written on our hearts is when we ask God to allow us to hear Him. He is always speaking, will I listen?
Tuesday, September 20, 2005
The Blessings
I met with a group of women today and we thought about the blessings that we have been given. As we began to list them it was quite obvious that our blessings are relationships we have or maybe even the second chances we have at those relationships. No one listed their house, car, groceries, or anything that would be considered an asset by society's standard. Boy, what an eye opener!
How many of us make our goal each day to gather as much stuff as possible? We know that our relationships are important and even tell ourselves that we are amassing things for the ones we love, but, OUR LOVED ONES WANT US NOT OUR STUFF!
We must stay focused on our relationships. At the end of the day what will really matter to each of us are our relationships. Period.
Here is the question of the day: Have I done all I can to be the best mom, wife, friend, daughter, (you fill in the blank) possible?
How many of us make our goal each day to gather as much stuff as possible? We know that our relationships are important and even tell ourselves that we are amassing things for the ones we love, but, OUR LOVED ONES WANT US NOT OUR STUFF!
We must stay focused on our relationships. At the end of the day what will really matter to each of us are our relationships. Period.
Here is the question of the day: Have I done all I can to be the best mom, wife, friend, daughter, (you fill in the blank) possible?
Monday, September 19, 2005
The Neverending Story
I find it quite interesting that even after 24 years of marriage Husband and I must still make a concerted effort to communicate. How can it be that conversation can be so illusive? You would think that after sharing our lives together and that of our children for so many years that talking about each day's events and how we feel would be a natural part of our day. But, NOOOO!!!! We must, each day, consciously set aside time to do that very thing, share our souls. What I have found over the last few days is that we are not the only couple that struggles in this area. In fact, there are several couples who have been married for fifteen years or more, that have the same challenge, communication. Well, twelve of us women who desire more than mediocre marriages, have joined forces and over the next six months, will read, discuss, and encourage one another about communication in our marriages.
Personally, I am really excited about this development among my friends. Some who will be in the group are simply acquaintances who need a support group to hold them accountable to trying to have a better marriage. Could this be an underground movement to reinforce family life in our community? Could having better marriages actually make a difference in our neighborhoods? Oh, yes, and even more. When we model healthy marriages that are built on good communication our children and even the kids that simply visit our homes will follow our examples and, yes, even desire strong, sound relationships themselves.
There you go! Two fabulous reasons for putting forth some effort to have good communication with Husband. #1 It's more fun for me to like Husband than to have quiet discord. #2 Everyone around me has more fun (even if they don't know that it is communication that makes life better).
My commitment: Concentrated time (20 minutes or more) to share myself with Husband.
Personally, I am really excited about this development among my friends. Some who will be in the group are simply acquaintances who need a support group to hold them accountable to trying to have a better marriage. Could this be an underground movement to reinforce family life in our community? Could having better marriages actually make a difference in our neighborhoods? Oh, yes, and even more. When we model healthy marriages that are built on good communication our children and even the kids that simply visit our homes will follow our examples and, yes, even desire strong, sound relationships themselves.
There you go! Two fabulous reasons for putting forth some effort to have good communication with Husband. #1 It's more fun for me to like Husband than to have quiet discord. #2 Everyone around me has more fun (even if they don't know that it is communication that makes life better).
My commitment: Concentrated time (20 minutes or more) to share myself with Husband.
Monday, September 05, 2005
Traveling with Women
I admit it, I stole the title. Our "official" journalist for the trip is going to use this title for our trip journal and it was just too good for me not use. Traveling with women is an event no woman should miss. We went to shop at an annual flea market in Virginia, but, what occured was much more than shopping. We laughed until our sides ached, we cried in reverent pain with each other, we shared our very souls with one other, and trusted that it would be held in high esteem and honored. What I expected was what I was given. A relationship with each woman that will always be special.
These friendships will always be extraordinary because we devoted four days to building this connection. We will always have the memories of a shared view of the Milky Way, a walk through a covered bridge, the thought of "kicking up diamonds", and a hug from Aunt and Uncle at the Old Cox Barn.
We have one thing in common that unifies us from which our bond is founded and it cannot be forged...Christ. He forgave us, saved us, and is the process of transforming us and that is the journey that we share and of which we shall never tire, the magnificent renovating power we see in each other as Christ reveals Himself in our lives. AMEN!!
These friendships will always be extraordinary because we devoted four days to building this connection. We will always have the memories of a shared view of the Milky Way, a walk through a covered bridge, the thought of "kicking up diamonds", and a hug from Aunt and Uncle at the Old Cox Barn.
We have one thing in common that unifies us from which our bond is founded and it cannot be forged...Christ. He forgave us, saved us, and is the process of transforming us and that is the journey that we share and of which we shall never tire, the magnificent renovating power we see in each other as Christ reveals Himself in our lives. AMEN!!
Monday, August 29, 2005
Walking
I walk for exercise with my sister in law. Our schedule was 4 miles every Monday through Thursday. We have just changed that schedule to 5 miles Mondays and Wednesdays and 2 miles on Fridays. We are devoted to being there, on time, ready to go. If she wasn't there I wouldn't go. Even though I love the effect the exercise has, leaner legs, higher metabolism, and an overall sense of health, I am there for the relationship we have. I love our talks. Some days we talk very little, and even that is comfortable. Some days we don't have enough time to share all that has built up from the day before. I think what makes it so good is that we are very similar. We have comparable goals and similar interests. We rejoice in one another's successes and cry with each other in pain and hardship. Her fun is my fun, even if we aren't together. I desire her very best, with or without me. I know that is true for her, too. That is what makes a good friendship. Not what we do together, but that our joy is for the other to succeed at whatever God has given them to do.
Thank you, sister, for being faithful, not just to walk with me but by being a good friend. (5 miles wasn't so hard!)
Thank you, sister, for being faithful, not just to walk with me but by being a good friend. (5 miles wasn't so hard!)
Tuesday, August 23, 2005
Silence is Golden
Silence. It's been a while since I have posted anything. I think there may be a couple of reasons for the silence.
First, sometimes I talk too much. So, in response to too much chatter, it is good for me to go on a fast of words, even to myself, which is essentially what this blog is, an exercise in personal expression.
Second, I really needed the time to take a break and not take myself too seriously. Could I really offer any insight that might shed light on this world? I have such a limited view of the events that surround me. "Lightbulb"!! Things that I experience and every little occurance in my world are not necessarily about me!
Silence is Golden? Another way to say it is, "experiencing life to the fullest with open ears and a teachable heart is worth a fortune!" Give me less of me and more of the valuable stuff, wisdom (ie Christ).
First, sometimes I talk too much. So, in response to too much chatter, it is good for me to go on a fast of words, even to myself, which is essentially what this blog is, an exercise in personal expression.
Second, I really needed the time to take a break and not take myself too seriously. Could I really offer any insight that might shed light on this world? I have such a limited view of the events that surround me. "Lightbulb"!! Things that I experience and every little occurance in my world are not necessarily about me!
Silence is Golden? Another way to say it is, "experiencing life to the fullest with open ears and a teachable heart is worth a fortune!" Give me less of me and more of the valuable stuff, wisdom (ie Christ).
Friday, August 05, 2005
Unity
Unity. Merriam Webster defines unity as "continuity without deviation or change (as in purpose or action)". I propose that most of us characterize unity as an exercise in self control. These I fear, are two completely separate and incompatable definitions.
The selfish definition that I have suggested is the simpler of the two for a limited time. Self control, simply for the sake of restraint, will soon give way to broader emotions of desire to manage our circumstances. When these emotions are bared, there is anything but "continuity without deviation". As these passions for power are unleashed, what becomes evident is that what we wish we would have done was to opt for the more difficult task in discussing, with others and within ourselves, that which we were choosing to be unified. Simply stated, the group must put forth a vision and each individual must decide whether they can put aside selfish ambition to function in the group. Only then is there one purpose for which to live. Easier said than done.
Webster's explanation of unity requires self examination and exorcism of anything within ourselves that is contrary to the final goal or purpose to which a group has committed itself. Obviously, self control becomes a part of this process, but, is only beneficial when we have loyalty to the objective put forth among the members.
I have chosen to be a part of a group of devoted people who think they have a common goal, glorifying our Heavenly Father. I believe that truly is the desire of our group, however, sometimes we appear to be sidetracked. Let us consider what best exemplifies our purpose, decide whether or not that is what we believe, then act in that manner. Enough said.
The selfish definition that I have suggested is the simpler of the two for a limited time. Self control, simply for the sake of restraint, will soon give way to broader emotions of desire to manage our circumstances. When these emotions are bared, there is anything but "continuity without deviation". As these passions for power are unleashed, what becomes evident is that what we wish we would have done was to opt for the more difficult task in discussing, with others and within ourselves, that which we were choosing to be unified. Simply stated, the group must put forth a vision and each individual must decide whether they can put aside selfish ambition to function in the group. Only then is there one purpose for which to live. Easier said than done.
Webster's explanation of unity requires self examination and exorcism of anything within ourselves that is contrary to the final goal or purpose to which a group has committed itself. Obviously, self control becomes a part of this process, but, is only beneficial when we have loyalty to the objective put forth among the members.
I have chosen to be a part of a group of devoted people who think they have a common goal, glorifying our Heavenly Father. I believe that truly is the desire of our group, however, sometimes we appear to be sidetracked. Let us consider what best exemplifies our purpose, decide whether or not that is what we believe, then act in that manner. Enough said.
Wednesday, July 20, 2005
What am I doing?
O.K., I know I have probably shared this before, but some days I cannot decide what my purpose is here. I have a very full life, ministry at my local church (to kids and women), a real estate job, caring for my husband and children, taking care of our household (I don't have a housekeeper), maintaining friendships, excersising 4 days a week (at 46 you have to or everything goes south!), and trying to remain flexible so that when things pop up I am available. I enjoy each of these segments of my life immensly. However, it does get tedious when it appears that my efforts are discouraged by others, or that I am having no tangible effect. The area in which I am discouraged today, and realistically for at least the past year, is in ministry.
When I accepted the position at our church to head up the women's and children's ministries it was because there was need and I felt a calling. After almost 3 years I am grateful for the challenge, the character it has built in me, and the memories, but, I see no change in the ministries in general, nor the people. I cannot call myself a failure because I feel I did my best and was faithful to do what I was called to do. But, maybe it is time for someone else to affect change in these areas. I cannot let my pride keep me in a position in which I should not continue. Maybe my ministry is something different than administration, maybe I should jump off into a new arena where I will really be stretched.
Timing is everything. Is now the time? Maybe.
When I accepted the position at our church to head up the women's and children's ministries it was because there was need and I felt a calling. After almost 3 years I am grateful for the challenge, the character it has built in me, and the memories, but, I see no change in the ministries in general, nor the people. I cannot call myself a failure because I feel I did my best and was faithful to do what I was called to do. But, maybe it is time for someone else to affect change in these areas. I cannot let my pride keep me in a position in which I should not continue. Maybe my ministry is something different than administration, maybe I should jump off into a new arena where I will really be stretched.
Timing is everything. Is now the time? Maybe.
Tuesday, July 12, 2005
Changes
Why is it that change is so difficult? Shouldn't it be exciting and fun? What makes so many people stuck in their ways? Personally, I love change. Probably, some might say, waaay to much. I look forward to the adventure and thrill of something new. It could be as simple as painting a room that brings me pleasure. Or even just moving the furniture around the house. The change that is soon to come will be huge, and I relish the thought. Our local church is about to explode with spiritual as well as numerical growth and it will be wonderful. With pleasure, I anticipate learning from new people, stretching in my worship experience, knowing more of God.
OK you people who are thinking of digging in your heels and resisting change, let me encourage you with a few simple words. No one is ever stagnate in their relationship with the LORD. You already ARE changing daily. You must simply choose whether to move forward or be dragged away by the tide of comfortable complacency.
I choose forward change. YIPPEE!!!
OK you people who are thinking of digging in your heels and resisting change, let me encourage you with a few simple words. No one is ever stagnate in their relationship with the LORD. You already ARE changing daily. You must simply choose whether to move forward or be dragged away by the tide of comfortable complacency.
I choose forward change. YIPPEE!!!
Tuesday, July 05, 2005
Words and Freedom
This past weekend we celebrated our liberty. As I contemplate this notion of liberty I find that it is quite an enigma. What I encountered this weekend, within myself, caused me to be perplexed as I considered the freedoms I enjoy.
I am free to work at any occupation at which I choose to be trained. I am free to serve any god, the Living God, or man made. I am free speak my mind and expound upon any subject I should choose, even if it is injurious in nature. That is where I cannot continue in my thoughts. You see, I found myself imprisoned by my own words this weekend. I freely used my words to express annoyance. Then, as I felt so free to announce my frustration in one area, I took the liberty to continue to articulate further my impatience with others as they failed to meet my expectations. My free use of words resulted in a sense of misery as I continued to talk too much about subjects that were none of my business.
Why, oh why, can I not exclusively use my words to encourage. Even if correction is necessary, the words used in that pursuit can be and should be encouraging and instill hope for a future, rather than discouraging words that inject disdain and discord.
Today I will measure my words, consider the cost, then I will endeavor to speak freely about hope to a world that desperately needs it.
I am free to work at any occupation at which I choose to be trained. I am free to serve any god, the Living God, or man made. I am free speak my mind and expound upon any subject I should choose, even if it is injurious in nature. That is where I cannot continue in my thoughts. You see, I found myself imprisoned by my own words this weekend. I freely used my words to express annoyance. Then, as I felt so free to announce my frustration in one area, I took the liberty to continue to articulate further my impatience with others as they failed to meet my expectations. My free use of words resulted in a sense of misery as I continued to talk too much about subjects that were none of my business.
Why, oh why, can I not exclusively use my words to encourage. Even if correction is necessary, the words used in that pursuit can be and should be encouraging and instill hope for a future, rather than discouraging words that inject disdain and discord.
Today I will measure my words, consider the cost, then I will endeavor to speak freely about hope to a world that desperately needs it.
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